I've learned many things in my 24 years on earth. For example:
- Owning a pet turtle may seem like a good idea at first, but when you get salmonella poisoning from the little guy it makes you wonder.
- It's much more fun to not care what strangers think about you. Yes, I am a male. Yes, I ride a scooter around town. Yes, I enjoy riding it.
- Arrested Development is the funniest show of all time.
Here's to 24 more. And also, 24 after that. That's all.
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